Come Clean
by jamiexh
Summary: Faberrittana.  9th in the "And Then There Were Four" series. As Quinn settles down in the Berry household, she reflects on her relationship with Brittany, Rachel, and Santana and how much her life has changed.


Title: Come Clean

Series: And Then There Were Four

Author: Jamiexh

Disclaimer: Ryan Murphy owns Glee.

Rating: PG-13

Summary: As Quinn settles down in the Berry household, she reflects on her relationship with Brittany, Rachel, and Santana and how much her life has changed.

Preceded by: Open Your Heart/ I'm Still Here/ Everything I Do, I Do It For You/ Girls Just Wanna Have Fun/ Pictures Of You/ How Do I Live Without You/ Regaining Unconsciousness/ I Think I'm Paranoid

"'Cause perfect didn't feel so perfect.

Trying to fit a square inside a circle,

Was no life."

-September 2010-

Quinn could never figure out how she and her three girlfriends could all squeeze themselves onto a tiny Queen sized bed. She guesses that it helps that the four of them are all really tiny. She won't lie and say that she doesn't love feeling the closeness of girls around her, because she does, especially when she's upset. And now is one of those times.

Quinn has just been kicked out of her house a second time. The Berrys have gracious given her the spare bedroom in their house and she couldn't be more grateful. But it still hurts and that first night, even though she's surrounded by her girls who love her, she cries herself to sleep.

Quinn wakes up, and glances over to see that the clock read 3:08. She snuggles back into Santana, and just looks at her other two girls cuddling facing her. Quinn just sighs, letting her mind wander to how she got here.

Quinn remembers that day that changed her life, the day she walked in on Rachel and Brittany pleasuring Santana in the empty classroom during summer camp. She couldn't believe the emotions flooded through her at that moment. First, there was embarrassment, because really who isn't embarrassed when they walk in on someone having sex. Then, to Quinn's chagrin, there was desire. She felt herself get wet just by watching the two girls play with Santana's hot naked body. And the last emotion, that was probably the worst in Quinn's mind, jealousy. And to be clear, Quinn wasn't jealous of any particular girl, but rather she was jealous that she wasn't participating in the sex.

Quinn knew then that she had to leave. She wasn't allowed to feel what she is feeling. It had long been drummed into her head that homosexuality is a sin. Her father had told her once that sex should be between a man and a woman after they were married. Granted, her dad was a jackass who kicked her out after she mistakenly slept with Puck while drunk and got pregnant. But still, the rules were beat into her and she knew she was supposed to follow them.

But then, Brittany grabbed her arm and invited her to play. That's when Quinn knew that it would all go downhill. At first she thinks it's only about sex, but she quickly learns otherwise.

"You should know Q that we play for keeps," Santana told her. "If you're in than you're with us." That was the moment her heart nearly stopped. In that one moment, Quinn was offered everything she could ever want. For years she's had a crush on Rachel, that's a truth she's admitted to herself. But, she would be lying if she denied that she didn't harbor a small crush and Brittany and Santana as well. "This isn't just about sex."

Quinn forced herself to question the relationship. She had to. She couldn't get her hopes up for nothing. But, when Brittany confirms it and kisses her, she can't help but kiss back after the shock wears off. Then Rachel's caress of her clothed breasts lights Quinn up like a fire. She knew she was done for, but she had to try to deny it, to try to save herself her last piece of dignity. She was Quinn Fabray. She couldn't let them know that she wanted this as badly as they did. But then Rachel whispered in her ear, and Quinn gave in to her desires.

She didn't know what to expect from them. She thought the sex would be rough and cutting, but Brittany, Santana, and Rachel were surprisingly gentle. Lowering her onto the floor, stripping her of her clothes, hands gently caressing, kisses teasing her, pushing her closer to the edge, and when Quinn comes she thinks she's in heaven. Because Santana was right, this wasn't about sex, it was about love.

…

The next morning Santana and Brittany left to get ready to come out to Brittany's parents. Rachel goes about her morning routine, and Quinn is left to dwell on the fact that she is, once again, forced to learn new rules in a new household.

"Is everything okay," Jackson asks, knocking on Quinn's open door.

"Yeah, fine," Quinn lies.

"Quinn," he says taking a seat on the bed. "Now I don't know what rules you had before at home, but rule number one in this house is that everyone is honest with each other. So, I'll ask you again. Is everything okay?"

"Not really."

"Go on."

"It's just hard," Quinn admits, sitting next to him. "I've lost my family again. The first time, it was the pregnancy. Now, it's because I'm gay. Wow, I've never said that out loud before. I'm gay."

"It's hard to admit," Jackson confirms. "It gets easier."

"You know who my parents are, Jackson. I grew up with a family so closed-minded it's a surprise that they weren't card carrying members of the Ku Klux Klan. I was taught what was quote unquote normal and that everyone else was a freak or an abomination. My family hated your family for that reason. We were the all-American family, we couldn't associate with anything less. You should know that even though, I called Rachel names, and slushied her, I never felt the same way as my family did. I've liked your daughter for a long time and now I love her. I love her and I love Santana and I love Brittany." Quinn pauses. "I don't know why it hurts so much. For years, I've been denying who I really am because it would interfere with our perfect family. I enjoy being on the Cheerios, but the only reason I joined was for my parents. Joining the celibacy club? That was because dad was ultra-religious and it was beaten into my head. I screwed up when I had sex with Puck. And I regret it. Well, I don't regret having my baby, but she deserves a much better life than I could have given her. I regret not losing my virginity to them, to someone I love."

"So it is love," Jackson asks.

"It's most definitely love. And that's what makes it perfect. It's funny. I used to live in a family that was considered perfect, but now I found perfection. I guess perfect isn't so perfect," Quinn explains.

…

"So it was crazy day today," Rachel concludes as she lies in Quinn's bed with her.

"It was a crazy of days," Quinn adds, pulling Rachel close. "We came out to Glee, and made a scene. We came out to our families. Found out that Sue Sylvester was Brittany's mom. And I moved in with you."

"Absolutely crazy," Rachel says pulling her in for a kiss.

Quinn moans. "I can do crazy if I get to kiss you some more." Rachel kisses her again. "I love you. You know that right?"

"Yeah, I do Quinn," Rachel answers. "And I love you."

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Everything I've done to you in the past. I know it's no excuse, but it was more my family's doing than anything else."

"I know," Rachel whispers, hands moving to grope Quinn's breasts. "Because if it wasn't, you would have never let us seduce you."

"Why, Rachel Berry," Quinn flirts, "I do think you are trying to seduce me right now?"

"Maybe," Rachel says with a kiss.

"But what about Brittany and Santana?"

"What about them?

"They aren't here," Quinn reminds her. They've never had sex without all of them being together.

"I'm dating you, too. We can have sex without them being here. It's allowed," Rachel explains. "Besides I don't want you to be upset anymore. Tonight, you're mine."

Quinn lets Rachel touch her, but answers back, "It's always been yours. You just didn't know it."

…

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